what if you just try something new...
like finding silly animals in sidewalk crack photographs
like i did above.
he's not the greatest elephant ever but it was so fun
to find him.
what if even though i don't like painted fingernails
i leave them and then proceed to spend the afternoon in the garden
digging around in the dirt, wearing rings and not even caring if i had gloves.
can i just say,
there is something a little bit bad ass
with rings and painted fingernails.
instead of ignoring the lemon balm that grows with wild abandon,
i decide to take a bunch of it home
and research it and discover that is is really quite something
(amazing it would appear)
and i should, you should, we all should be drinking it.
so i am.
and if you want some, tell me and i will bring you a bundle.
and what if i decided to act on my dreams
that wake me up,
and instead of pretending they don't mean anything much at all,
i decide that they do,
and i send a hello to everyone that visited me in them,
"hey! you showed up in my dreams. i am thinking about you"
it was a letter writing morning as a result,
and that is always a good thing.
just for fun, just to see what might happen,
i set up a flower cart today and decide to fill it for the weekend.
well, i did.
and i am going to fill it for Saturday and Sunday.
what if i decided to keep a pet chicken for a week.
you saw him i am sure
in some of my photos.
i loved that little chicken as much as one can love a chicken
before they become all chicken like on you
and need to go..
he is gone.
this is not a bad thing.
it was fun though,
having a chicken cuddled up in my arms for a while.
(and weird, very weird at moments)
what if i used these distractions,
these "what if's"
as a way of staving off the loneliness
, the worry, the unknown,
to push back at
the gremlins that keep me awake at night?