Thursday, November 15, 2012

Broken

My laptop is broken
I don't know how to blog from my phone
And add photos
And that changes the format of this space
And i feel broken too.

Today 
I need to go for a other iron infusion
And even though i know they are working
And my iron levels are improving
I do not want to go
I do not want another iv in my already 
Sore and tiny arm
The whole procedure makes me feel broken

I am taking a little class
And yesterday the assignment
Was to list everything i wanted to learn
Anything at all
But for 10 whole minutes
No stopping
You know, a free writing exercise. 
I lasted 4 minutes
And i felt broken. 
I can write long and fast but not 
For that exercise apparantly. 

I have a friend who is hurting
And another who is lonely
And one who is sick
And despite all the love i give
I can not fix them
And i too feel brokeas a result.

I intended just to check in
And tell you my laptop was broken
And the space here might be quiet
But i think perhaps
I needed to ask for grace
And gentleness
And patience
As i recognize that i am broken too.  





2 comments:

  1. It's okay to feel broken... sometimes that's all we can do. Express our feelings, accept them as part of who we are and move on to the next day. I feel broken because my body is engulfed in chronic pain from FM, Arthritus and multiple ailments. Every day is a struggle, but I move onward and count the blessings God has given me. Journaling helps so much and I am finding I need to make more time for it as frustration builds. Big hugs and blessings to you Tania.

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    Replies
    1. Thank you for reaching out and sending such love!

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