making space

(our cat has nothing to do with this post)

 

making space is a curiosity to me

because it seems that as soon as

it happens,

there is this rushing to refill it.

 

this is true for me in all my life areas,

but these days my thoughts turn to my home.

when we moved into this big house we were relocating from a

1000 square foot rectangle.

our shoe box house

 i call it and the six of us plust a few extras

over the two years we were there,

existed very close together.

 

it was, cozy.

 

we moved to this house,

all 3000 square feet of it,

and declared that we would

 never possibly ever be able to fill it all up.

 

and 5 years later i can declare that we were lying.

add on a few years of chronic illness and exhaustion

and the challenges that life has brought us

and i can tell you that house work

 and all that is necessary for the physical care of a house

has been very,very low on the priority list.

 

until now.

the energy has changed here recently

and slowly over the past year and i am noticing it and on a mission.

 

let the great de-cluttering begin

i said yesterday

 and i promised myself

 an hour a day would be devoted to getting rid of stuff

and after that,

 i would rearrange the rooms, clean the carpets, get house plants,

create spaces

 as i once did with such enthusiasm.

my house would become a home again.

 

so that would mean that today there should have been a few boxes by the door

ready to be taken away,

there would have been empty spaces showing up,

room for breathing being made.

 

but,

i just didn't want to

 you know?

it seems so overwhelming 

and well, time consuming

and i would rather colour.

 

procrastination.

the pitfall of many great transitions in life.

just not starting.

so i am here,

declaring that tonight at 7 pm

i am putting on the timer and beginning.

 

making space.

moving forward.

in all the areas of my life.

creating home.