today.

 

i just drove to the mailbox

because i have a letter that i want to be

in someone's hands before the end of this week

and

i also bought some almond extract

because i am making macaroons for owen

and i was listening to

mumford and sons

as i almost always am when i am driving

and my thoughts slowly and carefully

returned to last weeks tragedy

and i

found myself in tears

again

and i need to tell you why.

 

i have cried many tears for the families

and the loss and the horror and i have

spent hours pleading and asking for so much mercy

 to pour out upon that town

and those broken hearts

 

but that is not what the tears today are about.

 

four of my best friends,

my dearest heart sharing kindred spirits

are teachers.

and each time i allow myself to grieve for the teachers

of last week, i grieve for the teacher friends  i love

the friends that i hold in my heart. 

 

these women,

and all my other teacher friends as well,

men and women both,

beyond a shadow of a doubt

would have given their lives for their students.

they would have been whispering love and hope

and doing whatever they needed to do

to protect their little ones

and big ones

and that

breaks my heart into a million pieces

because i love them so much.

 

i am grateful for them.

their love. their devotion. their dedication.

i am sad that it takes a tragedy to remind me of this.