-that is me on Christmas day-
-trying to get used to the wrinkles that are showing up-
early in the morning hours
-3 am seems to be a favorite time-
when my body was screaming at me
-yes, it is still doing that, daily-
and i could feel a wave of hot,fierce anger begin to wash over me
i reminded myself
that i am bigger than the pain.
that i have
in the sense that i am well practiced and have nothing to fear.
poems formed in my head,
words tumbling together
but the swollen fingers refused to grasp a pen
so the words fell apart and drifted back to where they came
and i was left with
i wanted to have an out of body experience so i
could gather up the broken pieces of
in my arms
and whisper to each one,
that i will not break, i will be well, this too shall pass.
i wanted to
be a fortune teller
telling myself stories of my future wholeness.
but of course, we are not meant to know our futures
so instead i wait for the light to come and i comfort myself that somewhere it is morning time and people are starting their tea and saying their morning prayers and begining a fresh new day.
morning always arrives
and i return to myself to
delight in my present
through gratitude work
that will stretch me
the morning always comes.
i cling to that..