Sunday, July 31, 2011


i am husbandless this long weekend-
  owen is in Uculet salmon fishing
with a friend...
and i am noticing his absence.
in a good way.
i adore my husband and we are pretty much joined at the hip 
other than during work hours
and my life is very closly bound together
with my role as wife and mother.
hmmm...the word "role" worries me...
it doesn't sound like how i feel...
the joy, the privilidge, the responsibility, the choice
(hopefully you know what i mean)
and this leaves me with very little time or energy or
more honestly,
desire to broaden my connections.
it seems that each year, each month even
i become more of an introvert -
and i wonder if that is truly who i am
or if i am short changing myself by keeping to myself.
 i need to remember that while the internet can satisfy my need to immerse myself
in visual eye-candy, inspiring blogs and wonderful projects and ideas
those temporal experiences
are not anything more than that -
building strong connections with a few choice people,
making my own experiences and art
taking time for tea
and actually being in the presence of another kindred spirit
is a connection that is lasting.
tonight i am spending time with an old friend
(20+ years...we haven't been in touch for forever)
and last night i sat on a bench
and connected with a friend and former co-worker
tomorrow i will be surrounded by my family again
and owen returns home.
the connecting i have done while he has been away
will allow me to have stories and experiences to share with him -
and he with me
and our connection will deepen

(this blog post is a little bit all over the place in what i am trying to always, i just type from the heart and what gets put down, gets put down...i apologize to all of you who prefer a carefully crafted reading won't be found here)

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