Wednesday, January 4, 2012

this afraid part can be very noisy sometimes...


this afraid part,
when you are not sure where you are heading
and when you will be back
can be very noisy sometimes.
filling my head with scary thoughts
and deep insecurities
and noisy lies.

this afraid part
can stop me in my tracks.
cancel all my plans and hopes and dreams
for the day.

this afraid part
shouts and whispers words
and thoughts that are untrue
but they freeze me up just the same.

shouts and whispers
words that are heavy and dark and unkind

selfish, alone, lost, useless, forgotten, weak, sick, afraid

this afraid part
has always been a part of me
and used to come out to play with my heart and my soul and my head
almost every day
but for a while,
a long while,
this has not been the case.

and i did not invite this afraid part to play today
but she came anyway
right when i got out of bed.
how rude is that?
i hadn't even had my tea
or said my prayers
or anything.
she just came.
uninvited.

so i shall ask her to leave

i tried earlier but with no success
so i shall ask again.
with the bravery i have deep within
and she will leave.

this afraid part
will not define me today.




3 comments:

  1. Don't ask her to leave. Tell her!

    ReplyDelete
  2. oh! i hadn't thought of that! thanks Susan:)

    ReplyDelete
  3. And say it LOUD! Remember what Our Lord told us? "Be not afraid - for I am with you always!"

    ReplyDelete