getting out.

i created this little lady at a workshop on sunday.

a workshop that i had no intention

of going to

and that i staggered into

after a tough

weekend with my health

and a wonderful saturday night with my owen.

it is pure desperation sometimes

that drags me out of bed on the weekend.

desperation to feel like an adult.

to connect with owen over more than dinner and chores.

to create something for the over three year old set

is also something that i desperatly need to do sometimes.

so much of my day is spent in the delightful

mindset of young freedom.

there is alot of wonder and delight

and accomplishment and emotional outpouring

going on at my house all day long.

and i love that.

i love the love. i love the wonder. i love the exchanges.

but

i also need to stretch myself somehow too.

i need to feel the challenge of getting out of my sweats

and venturing into the world that i am a reluctant part of.

why do i need to do this?

because i miss experiences

by spending all my days and nights in my own four walls

i miss connections with people

i don't get to stretch myself in ways that can be fun and liberating.

i miss out on the beauty that is all around me.

lately gideon has been taking photos with his iphone

for me.

how sweet is that.

really.

 my man boy is coming home and  announcing

that he saw a ladybug on the bus today and took a photo for me.

capturing his day.

like i do.

i have ladybugs in my backyard as well

but i also want to meet them

in the suprising places

the cracks in the pavement outside the book store

in the folds of my jacket after a stroll along the water's edge.

this weekend helped me.

there was alot of beauty

in places

that i had no intention of ever going to.

i am glad i went.