Jan 5 2011                                     Blog #5 Confessions and dreams of a middle age woman

Dear Tania

 So I’m not sure where to begin for today’s blog. Our family has been introduced to Joe Ventura and scientific theories about ‘doom and gloom’ facing us in 2012, not to mention the Oil Crisis on the near horizon! … Laughable right? Conspiracy theories, doomsday sayers and end of the world prophecies. Quacks… Turn off the TV/computer….         Really?       Is that what I/we want to do?

‘So take a deep breath… sort through it….’ This is what I’ve been saying to myself for the last 24hrs. Let me just say, I don’t believe anyone knows when the end of the earth will happen; having said that, it’s hard to turn away from educated people who are trying to warn society of some real possibilities of impending crisis. So without becoming a paranoid schizophrenia … how does a person prepare in a balanced way for possible trials. As a Christian we know an end is coming, we also know that the very air we breathe and the numbers of hairs in our head are all in God’s hand. He is in control. Yet, He warns us about being ready, prepared, and not foolish like the 10 unwise virgins…. Hmmmm…. So, What does this mean for us?

Tonight at supper our family had a discussion about this. What do we do if we do anything at all? The reactions are predictable. Laughter from some, despair from others, and a ‘let’s live in excess for tomorrow we die’ from another. From me earlier in the day a predictable response was ‘research’. I spent the day reading and listening to as many educated people/theories as I could.  Then of course I want to talk about it. I need to talk through my issues and concerns and thankfully others were willing tonight. So what did we come up with? We recognize a need to continue living as normally as we can but all agree that being prepared for any disaster is not a bad thing. Emergency workers have been preaching the urgency to get prepared for any possible crisis and certainly living in BC for the past 13 years I have heard this call over and over! But did nothing… till today that is. Today it got to me. I still believe my life lies safe within God’s hand but I do feel a sense of priority to be wise! So we have decided as a family to make a plan for preparedness. I have no idea what this will look like. And so, how does this affect me and goals for 2011. Well, honestly, it took the wind right out of my sails… I’m thinking more about canning everything I can and storing water than I am about a career change… Really Suzanne? Is that really where you want to go? No of course not… but how can I ignore what I have just learned because I don’t like it and don’t want to believe it and want to write everyone off as fools…. Grrrr… this is throwing water on the fire I was trying to build…. But then it’s not about me…. Or about you… It’s about His Plan…

Great! My word for 4 years in Victoria was balance. I thought moving to Alberta meant a new word. Perhaps...time will tell. So my confession for today is that I feel a renewed connection to the word ‘balance’. I need to move forward but in a sense prepare for crisis. Great.  Dreams… just not feeling it today!